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Expectations

By February 17, 2016August 28th, 2020No Comments
VALENTINE’S DAY IS HERE AGAIN. AND I AM REALLY CURIOUS ABOUT WHAT MEN THINK AND EXPECT FOR VALENTINE’S DAY VERSUS WHAT WE WOMEN THINK AND EXPECT.  BECAUSE OF EXPECTATIONS WE SET OURSELVES UP FOR DISAPPOINTMENT. SO I WAS THINKING ABOUT MYSELF AND WHAT I EXPECT.  I AM NO DIFFERENT FROM MOST WOMEN.  WHAT I EXPECT IS THE EFFORT TO SHOW ME THAT I AM SPECIAL TO HIM.  A CARD IS NICE BECAUSE IT IS SOMETHING THAT I CAN TREASURE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.  AND WHO DOESN’T LOVE A NICE ROMANTIC DINNER?  WHAT I DO KNOW IS THAT I DON’T EXPECT FANCY PRESENTS, BUT I LOVE THE VERBAL EXPRESSION THAT I AM SPECIAL TO HIM.  WHAT HE EXPECTS FROM ME?…I WOULD THINK THE SAME.

MY CURIOSITY LED ME TO FIND OUT MORE, SO I DECIDED TO ASK MEN AND WOMEN THEIR OPINION OF VALENTINE’S DAY, AND HERE IS SOME OF WHAT I FOUND.

I ASKED MEN, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR PARTNER EXPECTS FOR VALENTINE’S DAY? AND WHAT DO YOU EXPECT?

PABLO, 38: I USE TO BELIEVE THAT WOMEN WANTED MATERIALISTIC GIFTS, BUT I HAVE LEARNED THAT WOMEN WANT WORDS, THE VERBAL EXPRESSION OF LOVE IS MORE IMPORTANT. WHEN IT COMES TO WHAT I EXPECT…NOTHING.

CISCO, 41:  THE SIMPLE FACT OF MAKING AN EFFORT OF PLANNING A SPECIAL DAY AND MAKING THEM FEEL SPECIAL.  AND WHAT DO I EXPECT? ….. JUST A PLEASANT EVENING.

CAMILO, 12:  IT DEPENDS, IS THIS A 4 YEAR RELATIONSHIP, 30 YEAR RELATIONSHIP, FIRST MONTH? BUT FOR        MY AGE A LITTLE BOX OF CHOCOLATES, A CARD.  AND FOR ME, MAYBE A LITTLE BOX OF CHOCOLATES BUT MOSTLY NOTHING.  THE MEN ARE THE ONES WHO ARE SUPPOSED TO GIVE.  THE MEN DON’T EXPECT THE BIG THINGS THAT WOMEN DO.

RALPH, 58:  WELL, EVER SINCE WE MET, HE HAS ALWAYS RECEIVED A DOZEN RED ROSES AND A BOX OF CHOCOLATES SO NOW THAT IS WHAT HE EXPECTS.  AND I EXPECT THE COOCHI-COOCHI!

RICHARD, 70:   THERE IS NOT SO MUCH EXPECTED, BUT JUST WORDS OF LOVE AND APPRECIATION RATHER THAN A MATERIAL GIFT.  DEPENDING ON THE SITUATION, MAYBE A NICE SURPRISE DINNER AT A RESTAURANT OR SOMETHING SPECIAL.  FOR ME, I EXPECT THE SAME THING IN RETURN, MUTUAL APPRECIATION.  LOVE IS FOR ALL 365 DAYS OF THE YEAR!  BUT PERHAPS SOMETHING SPONTANEOUS, IN THE MOMENT, LIKE A HIKE, DINNER, JUST SOMETHING WE WANT TO DO TOGETHER.

ZACH, 27:  MY GIRLFRIEND DOESN’T EXPECT ANYTHING FOR VALENTINE’S DAY, AND NEITHER DO I.

ROB, 49:  I THINK SOCIETY PUTS IT ALL ON THE GUY.  IT’S ALWAYS BEEN ABOUT THE GUY TRYING TO WIN THE WOMAN.  BUT I THINK THINGS ARE CHANGING.  VALENTINE’S IS NOT REALLY A BIG DEAL FOR ME, BUT A NICE DINNER ALONE WITH MY WIFE IS REALLY ENJOYABLE.

I ASKED WOMEN, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR PARTNER EXPECTS FOR VALENTINE’S DAY? AND WHAT DO YOU EXPECT?

CHRISTINA, 57:  I THINK A MAN WANTS TO NOT FEEL PRESSURE, AND HE WANTS TO DO SOMETHING SIMPLE TOGETHER.  MAYBE ENJOY A NICE DINNER OUT AND TO RECEIVE SOME FLOWERS OR A CARD.  FOR ME, I WANT THE FLOWERS, THE CHOCOLATE, THE SHOES, AND FOR HIM TO COOK ME A ROMANTIC DINNER.

NAOMI, 28:  HE EXPECTS LOVING KISSES AND A DELICIOUS HOMEMADE MEAL.  WE USUALLY MAKE DINNER TOGETHER AT HOME AND ENJOY IT WITH SOME NICE HOME BREWED BEER.  I EXPECT A SWEET NOTE            EXPRESSING HIS LOVE AND A NIGHT OF FUN ROMANCE.  IT’S IMPORTANT FOR US TO HAVE A NICE INTIMATE CELEBRATION BUT NOTHING TOO FANCY.

VICTORIA, 60:  THAT’S A HARD QUESTION, BECAUSE HE DOESN’T CELEBRATE VALENTINE’S DAY.  AND MY BIRTHDAY IS TWO DAYS BEFORE SO THE TWO ARE USUALLY LUMPED TOGETHER. BUT I WOULD ALWAYS LOVE FLOWERS, CHOCOLATES, AND A CARD, BUT THIS DOESN’T HAPPEN.

ALEXIA, 25: I HOPE THAT IT DOESN’T MAKE A DIFFERENCE IF IT IS VALENTINE’S DAY, BUT THAT HE WOULD EXPECT THE SAME FROM ANY OTHER DAY THAT WE ARE CLOSE AND SPEND TIME TOGETHER.  LOVE SHOULD BE A PART OF EVERYDAY.  I WANT TO SPEND TIME WITH HIM AND HAVE A GOOD TIME.  IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT WE DO, BUT IT WOULD BE NICE TO GO SOMEWHERE SPECIAL LIKE SOME HOT SPRINGS.

MY CONCLUSION:

IT’S OBVIOUS TO ME THAT AS WOMEN WE EXPECT MORE THAN MEN WHEN IT COMES TO VALENTINE’S DAY.  BUT AS MUCH AS WE ALL SAY THAT WE DON’T EXPECT MUCH, WE ALL DO, ALL MEN AND WOMEN. MAYBE THE DIFFERENCE IS THAT MEN JUST AREN’T AS SPECIFIC AS WOMEN ARE.  MEN MIGHT BE MORE SATISFIED WITH SOMETHING SIMPLE, BUT THEY STILL WOULD LIKE SOMETHING.   THE WORD THAT STANDS OUT THE MOST IS EFFORT.  AND YES, MAKING THE EFFORT TO SHOW YOUR LOVE IS WHAT MAKES A HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!

P.S.  PLEASE SEND ME YOUR THOUGHTS AND HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!

GUADALUPE